Dr. Who

On Saturday, I went to see a new doctor. She was recommended by my primary doctor. She wasn't actually my first choice but she was the only one who was open on Saturdays. I got a call from her office on Friday afternoon and was asked some questions. The question and answer portion saved me the hassle of having to fill out paperwork the next day. I was asked the standard new patient questions. After all the standard questions were asked, they lady asked me what my hobbies are and what I like to receive as gifts. I thought I heard wrong and asked her to repeat herself. I wasn't hearing things. She asked me what kind of gifts I liked to receive. Gifts in general are nice to receive and that's exactly what I said.

So the next morning I go to the office and walk into this:



This is the waiting room. I got creeped out. It smelled like dust. There was even a fake fireplace but no magazines to read. I always get nervous when I go to a doctor because I'm always expecting something to be wrong. My stomach started to hurt and the creepiness of the office did not help. After waiting for almost 30 minutes I got called inside. I was checked by a nurse and was told to wait in the doctors office. As I waited, I listened to the doctor talk to patients on the phone. She was a clown but seemed very concerned! I waited 30 minutes. By the time the doctor came in, I was ready to throw up. The doctor finally walked in and she reminded me of the old lady on a pack of Grandma's cookies.




She asked me a couple of questions and I told her I was anemic. She lectured me about the importance of taking iron and B-complex vitamins. She would lecture and then crack a joke. What a hoot. I was still sort of creeped out by the whole office decor. After our chat, she brought me to the exam room and was greeted by this:



Not only was the exam garment pink, there was a Dove chocolate on top. Notice the floral printed table cover. It was more like a disposable table cloth you would use to cover a picnic table instead of the usually toilet seat cover-like ones. I wanted to walk out of there already. I was genuinely freaking out.

I started to relax when she checked my lymph nodes and I didn't feel any pain. I've had doctors who examined my lymph nodes and I felt like I was being choked. In the end I felt like I had found a really good doctor despite the weird decor and rituals. She said she wanted to take my blood to test my blood levels but she never came back, so I left. Before leaving the office, the lady at the desk stopped me and handed me a box of bath salts, soap, and lotion. She said it was a gift from the office. So that's why I was asked what type of gifts I like to receive. I should've said I like to receive cars and diamonds!! Can't wait til my next visit which I'm hoping is not anytime soon. The longer the time between visits indicates my level of wellness ... or so I think.